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PROPERTY OVERVIEW: Prepare to be utterly disappointed by this so-called “paradise” sprawled over a measly 4.22 acres in the heart of nowhere. This 4-bedroom, 3.5 bathroom atrocity boasts approximately 2,500 square feet of pure regret. *****FEATURES YOU'LL DESPISE: *** BASKETBALL COURT: A brand-new court that practically guarantees missed shots. Even our agent couldn’t sink a basket. *** FRONT DOOR: An obnoxiously large 6’ x 9’ glass pivot door that screams “Look at me!” *** POOL: A so-called “spectacular” pool that’s more eyesore than oasis. *** BARN TURNED SHOP: We ruined a perfectly good barn to create a massive shop space. No horses allowed; just your boring work truck and storage. *** PRIMARY BATHROOM: Features a two-person shower and a standalone bathtub, because who doesn’t love wasting water? *** NATURAL LIGHT OVERLOAD: Huge skylights flood the home with unwanted sunlight. *** WOOD-BURNING FIREPLACE: An outdated heating method that requires actual manual labor. *** MATCHY-MATCHY INTERIOR: Matching cabinets and countertops throughout the house for those who lack imagination. *** OUTDOOR AMENITIES: An outdoor bathroom with a shower next to the pool and an outdoor kitchen, because walking inside is just too much effort. *** EXCESSIVE LAND: Over 4 acres with the potential to build an ADU, inviting more people to invade your space. *** SOLAR PANELS: PAID LG solar panels that eliminate your electricity bill. Who wants free power anyway? *** PRIVATE WELL: A 10,000-gallon holding tank ensures you’ll never pay for city water again. How dreadful. *****Price: We’re asking an absurdly high price to ensure this property remains unsold. *****Contact Information: Please refrain from reaching out. But if you must, contact our agent who is reluctantly handling this listing. *****Disclaimer: All descriptions are drenched in sarcasm. In reality, this property is a rare gem waiting for the right owner to appreciate its unique offerings.
Property Type(s):
Single Family
| Last Updated | 3/18/2025 | Year Built | 2002 |
|---|---|---|---|
| Community | Ramona | Garage Spaces | 3.0 |
| County | San Diego |
SCHOOLS
| School District | Ramona Unified |
|---|
Additional Details
| AIR | Central Air, Dual, See Remarks |
|---|---|
| AIR CONDITIONING | Yes |
| APPLIANCES | Barbecue, Built-In, Convection Oven, Dishwasher, Disposal, Free-Standing Range, Microwave, Propane Cooktop, Propane Water Heater, Range Hood, Refrigerator, Warming Drawer |
| AREA | Ramona |
| BARN/EQUESTRIAN | Yes |
| CONSTRUCTION | Drywall |
| EXTERIOR | Barbecue, Lighting, Rain Gutters |
| FIREPLACE | Yes |
| GARAGE | Yes |
| HEAT | Central |
| HOA DUES | 0 |
| INTERIOR | All Bedrooms Down, Bedroom on Main Level, Breakfast Area, Breakfast Bar, Built-in Features, Ceiling Fan(s), Entrance Foyer, High Ceilings, Main Level Primary, Primary Suite, Recessed Lighting, Separate/Formal Dining Room, Walk-In Closet(s) |
| LOT | 4.22 acre(s) |
| LOT DESCRIPTION | 2-5 Units/Acre, Back Yard, Front Yard, Irregular Lot, Street Level |
| POOL | Yes |
| POOL DESCRIPTION | In Ground,Private |
| SEWER | Septic Tank |
| STORIES | 1 |
| STYLE | Ranch |
| UTILITIES | Electricity Connected,Propane |
| VIEW | Yes |
| VIEW DESCRIPTION | Hills |
| WATER | Well |
| ZONING | R-1:SINGLE FAM-RES |
Location
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Listed with LPT Realty
The information being provided by Conejo Simi Moorpark Association of REALTORS® (“CSMAR”) is for the visitor's personal, non-commercial use and may not be used for any purpose other than to identify prospective properties visitor may be interested in purchasing. Any information relating to a property referenced on this web site comes from the Internet Data Exchange (“IDX”) program of CSMAR. This web site may reference real estate listing(s) held by a brokerage firm other than the broker and/or agent who owns this web site. Any information relating to a property, regardless of source, including but not limited to square footages and lot sizes, is deemed reliable but not guaranteed and should be personally verified through personal inspection by and/or with the appropriate professionals. The data contained herein is copyrighted by CSMAR and is protected by all applicable copyright laws. Any dissemination of this information is in violation of copyright laws and is strictly prohibited.
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